Today was Jona's appointment with Dr. Cantor. We drove up to Salt Lake and met with Dr. Cantor for about 2 and 1/2 hours. It is very interesting to sit down with a professional and have them ask you questions about your child. It really makes you think about certain things and sometimes it will open your eyes to things that you haven't noticed before.
For those of you that don't know we have been concerned about our oldest child, Jonathan, and his behaviors. When he was a baby we really had to work to get him to make eye contact and we were concerned about Autism. We expressed this concern to our primary caregiver at the time and he told us not to worry about it as long as he was making eye contact. Then just before Jona turned 5 my mother (who works with children who have Autism) had the chance to teach his Sunday school class and she suggested that we have him tested because he did show some signs of Autism. So two years ago we had him tested and they told us that he was just developmentally delayed but that we should probably have him tested again in a few years.
The few years have gone by and he is struggling with behavior difficulties and becoming distracted (more and more) at school. Luckily the teacher and the school really want to help Jona. They think that the best thing for him would be a 504 aide but to get that we need a diagnosis from a certified Dr. Well we got the diagnosis today. Jonathan has Autism.
It is a bit hard to grasp because for so long we have been saying that he doesn't have this disease and now we are told that he does. It's going to be extra hard to tell this to the school principle after so vehemently denying that he may have Autism. (It's a pain to be wrong ;o)
I do have to say that, in a way, I am glad that he hasn't been diagnosed before now. Why? Because this way we haven't let a "label" or a diagnosis give us a chance to make excuses for him or maybe hold him back from learning and doing. I think that we are better parents because of Jonathan and his behaviors and mannerisms. I am glad that we have the diagnosis now. Now we can go forward and learn more about what we can do to help Jonathan be happy and productive in his life. The Dr. said that he really needs help in the social areas...which was something that we have already known. She gave us some information about a Social Skills class that may be available, not only for Jona but for us as well. She also said that there was much information out on the internet and in books and such that will help us as we strive to help Jona. I have to admit it is a bit daunting but I will do whatever it takes to help Jona be happy and healthy and to grow up knowing that he is loved. What parent doesn't want that for their child?
I will tell you this...I will not allow this diagnosis to define Jonathan. This is something that I will make perfectly clear to his school and his teachers. Jonathan is a child. A bright, loving, caring, inquisitive, sensitive child. A child with a disease, yes but I don't want him labeled as the "Autistic" child. As I said before, my mom works with children affected by Autism and she said that something that they have really drilled into the people who work with these children is that they have Autism....they have a disease but they are not to be labeled as "Autistic". I hope that we will be able to convey this to his teachers and other educators that will be working with Jona. It looks as if we have an interesting future that lies ahead...not that we didn't before but there may be more stumbling blocks that we need to turn into stepping stones than there were before. But I say bring it on...anything I can do for my child, I will do.
The change to Daylight Savings time is SO rough. I am extremely tired and every little thing is setting me off. Poor George and McKenna must think some rude, ornery alien has taken over my body.
I went down to help Jona with spelling today. I was a little late getting there and I guess he was upset by that. Miss Burton tried to get him to start without me but that just upset him even more. I talked with her a little bit after class and she said that the days that I come down to help out he won't do anything later on in the day. He ignores her when she tries to talk to him and she says that he just sits at his desk and doesn't participate. In the afternoons they do math and the school has been working on a program that reminds me a bit of the "new math" that they tried years ago...called Math Investigations. I know a lady that has pulled her child out of school during math and works with her son at home. I am wondering if this is something that I should look into. We have the meeting with the psychologist this week hopefully we can get some insight there. If we just get the same old "Jona is such a unique child..." deal I don't know what I will do. I need to know what I can do to help him achieve what he wants to and, most importantly, be happy. To be honest with you the fact that I haven't been able to come up with the answer on my own has made me feel a bit of a failure as a parent. It is very frustrating for me and I can't even begin to imagine how frustrating it must be for Jona. He's asked me a couple of times this past month "How many books do you need to read to be a scientist?" He LOVES science...all aspects of it and I wonder if the stuff that they do in school is just boring him out of his skull. *big sigh*
I am so tired right now I need to get some rest, step back and take a deep breath. Things will look better after that.
